your faith was strong

Aren't we 16 and heartbroken? Since when were we grown up and responsible? I can't believe this day is here. We've only talked about it a gazillion times.  He's been one of my best friends and he's been the best example to me. He honestly makes me laugh when I'm crying, He reminds me I am never alone. My heart holds a special place for this guy. Peru is lucky to have him.

"Go ye now in peace and know that the love of God will guide you, feel his presence here besides you, showing you the way. In your times of trouble, when hurt and despair are there to grieve you, know that the Lord will never leave you. He will bring your courage. Know that the God who sent his son to die that you might live, will never leave you lost and alone in his beloved world. Go ye now in peace."

I love you Elder Wheatley. Thanks for everything. And like you said, it's only two years right? 

with some indie record that's much cooler than mine

I remember when we broke up the first time
Seeing this is, and had enough, it's like
We haven't seen each other in a month
When you, said you, needed space, what?
When you come around again and say
Baby, I miss you and I swear I'm gonna change
Trust me, remember how that lasted for a day
I say, I hate you, we break up, you call me, I love you

We called it off again last night
This time I'm telling you, I'm telling you
We are never ever ever ever getting back together
You go talk to your friends talk and my friends talk to me
But we are never ever ever ever getting back together

I'm really gonna miss you picking fights
And me, falling for a screaming that I'm right
And you, will hide away and find your piece of mine with some indie record that's much cooler than mine

I used to think, that we, were forever ever
And I used to say never say never
Huh, he calls me up and he's like, I still love you
And I'm like, I mean, I mean this is exhausting, you know
We are never getting back together, like ever

We are never ever ever ever getting back together.

(It's a little bit too much pop for my T. Swift but seriously? Love) 

all packed up and getting out of here

Two and a half years ago, I promised myself this would never be my home.
I hated every bit of my life, bitter and angry, I told myself I'd never accept this place.
I was embarrassed about the move, I was ashamed of my parents, I was upset.
8 months of construction followed. 
The worst 8 months of my life.
Our whole main floor was being torn about with my mom's own two hands.
7 of us were crammed in 3 rooms, no kitchen, hardly any money to our name.
I felt alone and bitter. This place could never be my home.
It was hell.

I look around at my half packed room, clothes all over the floor.
I still don't have carpet installed and I haven't had closet doors since we moved in.
My walls are painted half blue and the air conditioning doesn't function properly.
The toilet in my bathroom is still hideous pink and the boys still haven't learned how to flush it.
I laugh each time I remember we still don't have a railing and we have a broken baby gate so Maddox doesn't fall down the stairs when he sleep walks.

This place is far from perfect but it is everything my home is.

Home is coming home from a long day of school and activites and having Puffy greet me with a hug.
Home is the countless hours I've spent listening to music while doing the dishes.
Home is a skate ramp in my garage because that's just the way my dad is.
Home is stickers on my door and writing that says "Maddox" all over it.
Home is the annoyance that my TV always has to be on during family dinner.
Home is rushing to get the perfect Sunset photo at 7:45.
Home is loud. Crazy loud. One million little people, big people, all over the place, going and going.
Home is the leftover Little Caesars boxes and Wills Pit Stop Cups all over the place.

I've been so excited for freedom.
No more doing dishes for 8 million, or arguing with my parents.
No more little kids yelling at me or watching dumb tv shows or babysitting.
Freedom. I get to do what I want when I want.

Nothing breaks my heart more than saying goodbye to home.
I can't imagine what it is going to be like to not see punk Maddox every day or Walker saying something ridiculous like "I'm not sitting down, I'm kneeing" No, not kneeling, kneeing.
And don't get me started on Puffy.
She's my little best friend. I love her more than anything I can explain.
Little Puffers has been through a lot for an 8 year old and I just see this amazing human being she is going to grow up into.
I love the way she youtubes Primary songs and asks me to read the scriptures to her.
She has the most special spirit I've ever seen in a person.
Truth of the matter is, these kids have been my best friends for almost ten years.
These kids are my home.
They are my everything.
And it breaks my heart to know I won't be around as much.
I'm going to miss their daily innocent laughs and the silly things they say.

I'm saying goodbye to home so I can make my dreams into reality and grow up. It's time. I'm ready. Four days from now I'll be out. I'll be free. It's all I've ever wanted.

"Happy is what happens when all your dreams come true, well isn't it?"

If that's the case, why am I bawling my eyes out? 

in another life

So I kind of love her.

the girl in the dress wrote you a song

 

Because I have been obsessed with this song since February and it still isn't old. 

sing it out loud

I have invented something magical.

It begins, fog on the stage and the lovely sounds of "Sun Hands" begins. Local Natives are on stage bursting the melodies of my favorites, "Airplanes" "Who Knows, Who Cares?" "World News" "Wide Eyes" and "Camera Talk"

After the Local Native lovin', the stage clears and a beam of light ascends to the middle of the stage, Ingrid Michaelson charms us with "Are We There Yet?" "The Chain" and "So Long"

The audience is ready for a pump up jam. Taylor Swift  impresses the crowd with "You Belong with Me" (Because who doesn't want to jam out to that?) "Fearless (just because it's amazing) and a few other hit tunes of my choice at the time. Currently, I'd say "Better Than Revenge" or "Dear John" but that's just because I've been listening to the Speak Now album nonstop. Of course there's always "Ours" her newest cutest hit. We'll cross the bridge of which Taylor songs we get to jam out with in a bit.

Next, come, Mumford and Sons come out and perform not only their whole album of "Sign No More" Everyone knows their whole album is just too good to pick a select few. They'd also do a few covers of my favorites, like "Wagon Wheel" (check that song out, too good) and "Love Vigilantes" (Iron and Wine anyone?)

Obviously, Ingrid Michaelson would join Mumford on stage for a duo of my favorite song of all time (okay one of them) the famous"Landslide." Also, they'd do an amazing cover of "Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.

Back from the dead of course would be Michael Jackson, obviously. He'd wow the crowd with dancing, Billie Jean, Man in the Mirror, Black or White, The Way You Make Me Feel and what nots. He's like Taylor, it will depend on my mood.

We'd probably just listen to "Call Me Maybe" but not live because that would ruin it.

Coldplay would come, because they are Coldplay. Duh.

Goyte would come sing "Somebody I Used to Know" and probably do a killer cover of "Hallelujah" (only one of the best songs ever written ever.)

And the show would end with my boy James Taylor. We'd sing along to Sweet Baby James, How Sweet It Is, Carolina in my Mind and obviously Fire and Rain.

It'd be a five hour long concert, probably, and in my magical world you wouldn't get tired, hungry or lose your voice. Everyone would be happy and no one would be drunk.

 I might have just created heaven. Just saying.

believe in something else

Time to time, it hits me. 

So long to you. 

you'll never be what is in your heart

You are forcing me to remember when all I want is to just forget you.

always stuck on my mind

This song never gets old. 

you get addicted to a certain kind of sadness

But you didn't have to cut me off

Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing

And I don't even need your love

But you treat me like a stranger and I feel so rough

No you didn't have to stoop so low

Have your friends collect your records and then change your number

I guess that I don't need that though

Now you're just somebody that I used to know.

(best song ever)

you make my dreams come true

Winter Break. Mayson and Sarah Style.

life goes on like a song

Photo Credit

January 24, 2012

music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive

Some days you replay a song over and over again, trying to believe in the words, trying to convince yourself that it will be okay,  fighting the voice in the back of your head yelling at you that you should just quit, while you pray to God that you can make it through another day.

"I swim for brighter days despite the absence of sun"

just keep your head above

You haven't come this far to fall off the earth.

say, you love me

say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime, that's all I ask of you.

(some songs makes you wanna be in love) 

As good ole Momma Tanna would say, "Your time will come." 

the landslide will bring you down

I'm sorry for all of the ways I hurt you.

You've changed. I've changed.
It's time I accept that, hold my head high and walk away

When I talk to you, it's weird to think we used to be best friends.

Unspoken confrontation, instead we small-talk of this and that.

I just wanna know something...

What do you really think of me?

it will set you free

There will come a time when love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears. Get over your hill and see what you find there. 

-After the Storm, Mumford and Sons

swim when it hurts

currents will pull you away from your love. 

i swim for better days despite the absence of sun.

just keep your head above.

(swim)

seal my heart and break my pride

Mumford and Sons. 

Local Natives.

Give me more. Please. I can't get enough.

the world was sleeping

  Time: 11:59 PM. Song: Human by The Killers Activity: Psych Redos

 

Time: 12:29 AM. Song: Last Kiss by Taylor Swift. Activity: Psych Redos

Time: 1:02 AM. Song: Teardrops on My Guitar by Taylor Swift. Activity: Psych Redos

 

Time: 1:43 AM. Song: Bet On It from HSM2 Activity: Cleaning the Kitchen

 

Time: 2:17 AM Song: Last Christmas by the Glee Cast Activity: Superhero Psych Extra Credit

Time: 2:48 AM Song: Sort Of by Ingrid Michaelson Activity: Psych Notes

Time: 3:12 AM Song: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol Actvity: Psych Redos

Time: 3:42 AM Song: The Man Who Can’t Be Moved by The Script. Activity: Psych Redos

Time: 4:02 AM Song: Well no more songs, listening to the Old Testament. Activity: Seminary Reading